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Sep. 29th, 2001 10:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
novapsycheBefore I take off for now and let it seem like I'm utterly crazy, I'll post something I wrote some time ago in my spiritual journal, the last time I was on AMT. AMT is a thought drug, not racing thoughts produced like when on DXM, but constant thought, most often reflective. This is why I periodically go through this agony, make my body take a two-week sabbatical from all the foods it enjoys, just to get these insights.
8/4/01, approx. 10:30 p.m.
Even self-defense involves the loss of humanity, even if that loss is miniscule in terms of concrete measurement.
This movie (Blue Velvet) and Planet of the Apes (to some degree, but perhaps only in telling the story) glorifies violence as man's saving grace.
Violence is what causes our karmic retributions.
11:33 p.m.
Acid was for me my own private optical illusion. This illusion helped me to see the constant illusion of civilized life around me. This is why I call it a sacrament: it is a tool by which I can directly perceive the mystery of life and pierce it. It is a substance by which I can know my own spirit, challenge the reality around me, and let go of my ego so that I may commune with GOD.
12:02 a.m.
The Buddha said, "When one sees that everything exists as an illusion, one can live in a higher sphere than ordinary man."
Everyone is/can become/hopefully is in the process of becoming the Buddha.
12:12 a.m.
F [my boyfriend], I think, would do well to remember words uttered by Albert Einstein, a passionate scientist:
"We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality."
Too much reason robs us of our very passion. Being dispassionate *all* the *time* is not being in balance, neither with the universe nor with oneself.
8/4/01, approx. 10:30 p.m.
Even self-defense involves the loss of humanity, even if that loss is miniscule in terms of concrete measurement.
This movie (Blue Velvet) and Planet of the Apes (to some degree, but perhaps only in telling the story) glorifies violence as man's saving grace.
Violence is what causes our karmic retributions.
11:33 p.m.
Acid was for me my own private optical illusion. This illusion helped me to see the constant illusion of civilized life around me. This is why I call it a sacrament: it is a tool by which I can directly perceive the mystery of life and pierce it. It is a substance by which I can know my own spirit, challenge the reality around me, and let go of my ego so that I may commune with GOD.
12:02 a.m.
The Buddha said, "When one sees that everything exists as an illusion, one can live in a higher sphere than ordinary man."
Everyone is/can become/hopefully is in the process of becoming the Buddha.
12:12 a.m.
F [my boyfriend], I think, would do well to remember words uttered by Albert Einstein, a passionate scientist:
"We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality."
Too much reason robs us of our very passion. Being dispassionate *all* the *time* is not being in balance, neither with the universe nor with oneself.