![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
novapsycheSubject: Finally, the start of an explanation
Hello all. For those expecting this email, thank you for taking
the time to read it. For those not expecting (I have yet *more*
folks in the bcc: field :), please just give me time, space, and
the benefit of the doubt. I feel I have important news about
the direction of my life.
First off, let me again request that you excuse my apparent
megalomania. I assure you, I feel both megalomania *and*
meekness at the same time. I'm trying to be compassionate with
what I say.
Okay. *deep, quick sigh*
1. I feel I fundamentally understand Einstein's expression of
the theory of relativity. (See A below.)
2. I feel this because I feel I have gained an innate grasp of
(a) what the expression is [E=mc^2], (b) what the component
parts of that expression [which most people take at face value,
simply reading it as "E=mc^2"], and (c) what *I* think the
expression might mean.
3. I then internalized both what E=mc^2 is on the surface, and
somehow (see B below) found a way to relate myself TO that
expression.
4. Finally, I synthesized that new understanding in relation
with my old understanding, and in doing so found a way to
"see"--or, rather, learn how to intuitively interpret--"light",
AND how to use it pro-actively in my life. (See C.)
5. In other words, I found a common 'human' denominator,
expanded upon it, and gained a *smile* relatively new way of
looking at the world.
6. This new knowledge has helped me improve upon my current
state, which in turn helps me to learn what it is to improve.
7. From there, I can see how I can affect that change on a
larger system. That is, I have in essence taught myself the
very fundamentals of teaching.
8. This is not over yet!
Thus (I'd prefer to use the mathematic symbol for 'thus' in this
context, if it were possible), I feel I have become enlightened.
(See D.)
A. I knew, when I say this, that people's first reaction would
be, "This person must be either insane or simply
megalomaniacal!" This inchoate treatise is my first attempt to
prove, not only to myself but also to others, that some other
condition besides those listed may well apply.
B. I feel this is *smile* the *very essence* of the "theory" of
relativity. IN THEORY, we as a species--as well as
individuals--have the ability to relate to the world, and make
it so that the world relates to us. (Actually, this applies to
every thing, not just humans.) In the context of society and
human relationships, this can mean that, in the realm of
possibility, some person(s) could learn/be taught/come to
understand how to innately affect our environment.
The reason I feel *I* have been enlightened is because I
feel *I*, personally, would be able to accomplish ANYTHING,
given enough resources. I feel I have such a fundamental
understanding of not only my environment, but environments in
general, to relate that comprehensive idea to all other areas of
my life.
At the same time, I don't feel that ONLY I have this
possibility, this A-bility. I feel that, because I have been
instilled with the ideology of democracy, liberalism (i.e., a
loose system of social progress), personal freedom, and also
that of independence, resiliency, personal responsibility...
because I feel I now understand them, I can inspire others to
see in a similar fashion, and help them too to become
"enlightened".
C. I call this "use of fundamental knowledge to affect positive
change in one's environment", or the idea of using one's
self-confidence to bring about one's own idea of progress.
A lot of people seem to think that self-confidence is the
enemy of self-doubt. It is in some contexts, but in the greater
concept of what "self-confidence" IS & what "self-doubt" IS, we
recognize that they could not exist without the other; they are
unified in spirit. They necessarily operate in conjunction with
each other.
And in the even grander context, because a person can see
both the fluidity of concepts as well as the friction each
causes the other, we can begin to understand how to use both the
fluidity and friction in new situations. This brings about new
understanding, which brings about more change, which seems to be
the point of human existence (what some previous wise folk refer
to as "the human condition").
*sigh* It sounds like I'm just repeating myself over and over.
At least, that's what it feels like. If I haven't repeated
myself to you yet, let me know. I'll try to explain myself more
clearly.
Also note that the above explanation begs what I think of all
sorts of concepts, on all scales. But I realize I don't have
time to cover all of them. Not right now. (The right time will
present itself, and hopefully I will be watching well enough to
recognize it!)
D. [This is mainly for the benefit of the geeky Back
Tablers--particularly Leif! *smile*] I have been enlightened.
This has helped me to understand that not only am I enlightened
now, but I have always been enlightened, and, as long as I'm not
content to rest on my previous successes, I will always be in
the process of becoming enlightened.
So, what does all this REALLY mean? :)
Simply put, I can't put it all in one email. But the one thing
I'd really like people to put some thought into is the one thing
I presumed to be "common knowledge", and therefore I never took
the time to explain. I identify my missing yet supposedly
universally understood concept to be that of Time.
Time is the missing element in E=mc^2. (That's because it
can be factored out! But calculus teaches us that, to truly
understand something, we need to try to factor things back into
original equations as well.) Well, it's not *really* missing.
It's expressed in the operator, the equals sign. We've taught
ourselves, in the interest of fully pursuing progress, to
compress time so much so as to completely remove our
appreciation of it in our lives. I feel this to be true
ESPECIALLY in relation to our *selves*.
When we can figure out how to incorporate the idea of time
back into our normal way of thinking, maybe--just maybe--we can
"transcend" our current way of existence/expressing
action/producing thought. I mean, that's what transcendence is
supposed to mean, right? :)
All right, that's all I can say right now. My brain is
exhausted at the moment. :) It's been working a little
overtime. But I'm trying to learn how to compensate for that.
Anyway, feel free to write back and start public, group, or
private dialogue with me about anything here that may intrigue
you. I'm humble enough to realize that I may be my own start of
positive change, but without an outside environment to keep me
stimulated, I will fall back into my old ways of thinking. (I
used to assume I was always right.)
Take care, all. Know that each of you are in my thoughts.
Hello all. For those expecting this email, thank you for taking
the time to read it. For those not expecting (I have yet *more*
folks in the bcc: field :), please just give me time, space, and
the benefit of the doubt. I feel I have important news about
the direction of my life.
First off, let me again request that you excuse my apparent
megalomania. I assure you, I feel both megalomania *and*
meekness at the same time. I'm trying to be compassionate with
what I say.
Okay. *deep, quick sigh*
1. I feel I fundamentally understand Einstein's expression of
the theory of relativity. (See A below.)
2. I feel this because I feel I have gained an innate grasp of
(a) what the expression is [E=mc^2], (b) what the component
parts of that expression [which most people take at face value,
simply reading it as "E=mc^2"], and (c) what *I* think the
expression might mean.
3. I then internalized both what E=mc^2 is on the surface, and
somehow (see B below) found a way to relate myself TO that
expression.
4. Finally, I synthesized that new understanding in relation
with my old understanding, and in doing so found a way to
"see"--or, rather, learn how to intuitively interpret--"light",
AND how to use it pro-actively in my life. (See C.)
5. In other words, I found a common 'human' denominator,
expanded upon it, and gained a *smile* relatively new way of
looking at the world.
6. This new knowledge has helped me improve upon my current
state, which in turn helps me to learn what it is to improve.
7. From there, I can see how I can affect that change on a
larger system. That is, I have in essence taught myself the
very fundamentals of teaching.
8. This is not over yet!
Thus (I'd prefer to use the mathematic symbol for 'thus' in this
context, if it were possible), I feel I have become enlightened.
(See D.)
A. I knew, when I say this, that people's first reaction would
be, "This person must be either insane or simply
megalomaniacal!" This inchoate treatise is my first attempt to
prove, not only to myself but also to others, that some other
condition besides those listed may well apply.
B. I feel this is *smile* the *very essence* of the "theory" of
relativity. IN THEORY, we as a species--as well as
individuals--have the ability to relate to the world, and make
it so that the world relates to us. (Actually, this applies to
every thing, not just humans.) In the context of society and
human relationships, this can mean that, in the realm of
possibility, some person(s) could learn/be taught/come to
understand how to innately affect our environment.
The reason I feel *I* have been enlightened is because I
feel *I*, personally, would be able to accomplish ANYTHING,
given enough resources. I feel I have such a fundamental
understanding of not only my environment, but environments in
general, to relate that comprehensive idea to all other areas of
my life.
At the same time, I don't feel that ONLY I have this
possibility, this A-bility. I feel that, because I have been
instilled with the ideology of democracy, liberalism (i.e., a
loose system of social progress), personal freedom, and also
that of independence, resiliency, personal responsibility...
because I feel I now understand them, I can inspire others to
see in a similar fashion, and help them too to become
"enlightened".
C. I call this "use of fundamental knowledge to affect positive
change in one's environment", or the idea of using one's
self-confidence to bring about one's own idea of progress.
A lot of people seem to think that self-confidence is the
enemy of self-doubt. It is in some contexts, but in the greater
concept of what "self-confidence" IS & what "self-doubt" IS, we
recognize that they could not exist without the other; they are
unified in spirit. They necessarily operate in conjunction with
each other.
And in the even grander context, because a person can see
both the fluidity of concepts as well as the friction each
causes the other, we can begin to understand how to use both the
fluidity and friction in new situations. This brings about new
understanding, which brings about more change, which seems to be
the point of human existence (what some previous wise folk refer
to as "the human condition").
*sigh* It sounds like I'm just repeating myself over and over.
At least, that's what it feels like. If I haven't repeated
myself to you yet, let me know. I'll try to explain myself more
clearly.
Also note that the above explanation begs what I think of all
sorts of concepts, on all scales. But I realize I don't have
time to cover all of them. Not right now. (The right time will
present itself, and hopefully I will be watching well enough to
recognize it!)
D. [This is mainly for the benefit of the geeky Back
Tablers--particularly Leif! *smile*] I have been enlightened.
This has helped me to understand that not only am I enlightened
now, but I have always been enlightened, and, as long as I'm not
content to rest on my previous successes, I will always be in
the process of becoming enlightened.
So, what does all this REALLY mean? :)
Simply put, I can't put it all in one email. But the one thing
I'd really like people to put some thought into is the one thing
I presumed to be "common knowledge", and therefore I never took
the time to explain. I identify my missing yet supposedly
universally understood concept to be that of Time.
Time is the missing element in E=mc^2. (That's because it
can be factored out! But calculus teaches us that, to truly
understand something, we need to try to factor things back into
original equations as well.) Well, it's not *really* missing.
It's expressed in the operator, the equals sign. We've taught
ourselves, in the interest of fully pursuing progress, to
compress time so much so as to completely remove our
appreciation of it in our lives. I feel this to be true
ESPECIALLY in relation to our *selves*.
When we can figure out how to incorporate the idea of time
back into our normal way of thinking, maybe--just maybe--we can
"transcend" our current way of existence/expressing
action/producing thought. I mean, that's what transcendence is
supposed to mean, right? :)
All right, that's all I can say right now. My brain is
exhausted at the moment. :) It's been working a little
overtime. But I'm trying to learn how to compensate for that.
Anyway, feel free to write back and start public, group, or
private dialogue with me about anything here that may intrigue
you. I'm humble enough to realize that I may be my own start of
positive change, but without an outside environment to keep me
stimulated, I will fall back into my old ways of thinking. (I
used to assume I was always right.)
Take care, all. Know that each of you are in my thoughts.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Re: interesting, but...
Date: 2001-10-12 06:16 pm (UTC)I've been going through a lot of personal metamorphoses in the last couple of years, and none like those in the last 4-8 months. The email I posted... is something that needed to be sent at that time, but if I had to do it over again, knowing what I know now, I wouldn't have sent it in such a form.
In more ways than I can count, I'm less enlightened--or at least no more so--than I was three years ago. I'm not claiming to be the next incarnation of Christ, or whathaveyou. It appears that this whole transformation has been one big object lesson in pride.
I haven't read any Leary yet; one of my best friends from college suggested that I read some, and I intend to. (This also means that I'm firmly out of the loop, as far as Leary's encouragement of use is concerned, except for his well-touted line.) I did get a chance to read some of Terrence McKenna's Food of the Gods, which I found interesting. I don't know if I quite subscribe to everything he proposed, but his premise is thought-provoking, if nothing else.
Before I can say whether I've been enlightened, I must go back to the question, What is light? And I have. I've been reading scientific descriptions of light, gravity, quantum physics, dark matter, black holes. Science, a field which did not interest me in the slightest and in fact was a subject I intentionally avoided in college, has been the most compelling fount of knowledge I've come across in recent months.
I have had several periods of sobriety; if I hadn't, "Doppelgangrenous" would have been a complete lie on my part. I freely admit that, when I first started smoking marijuana, I was a heavy regular user. I went more than a year without any significant periods of non-use. And it went that way for awhile, until I made the conscious decision to "take a breather," as it were. The other substances I've tried have been few and far between, for the most part (DXM is a notable exception, since it is so widely available). Yet each has given me a different insight into the deliable nature of reality.
I appreciate logic for what it is and what it can do. But I also know that it is, by itself, inadequate to fully explain the workings and the meaning of the universe. Logic is our means of interpreting the world in an orderly fashion. But not everything is borne of order.
What does it mean to have a "reality-checker"? What if you have one, but unbeknownst to you it doesn't check reality very well? Why can't your reality-checker be yourself?
You seem to be someone who was caught up in the lure of drugs before, and it seems to me that you wish to warn me about the dark underside of substance use. I've seen and had several first-hand examples. And I'm trying as best as I can to keep those in mind, as counterbalances to my excitement about what knowledge entheogen-induced revelations might confer.
At the same time, I fully and uncompromisingly recognize that substance use, as religious sacraments, are part and parcel to my own type of religious spirituality. A lot of people would be outraged or frightened by such a statement, but I myself am long past those emotions.
Anyway, my research isn't over; in fact, it's barely begun. I'm reading as much as I can, learning what I can, incorporating what I can. I know I don't have all the answers. I'm looking both within and without.
Re: interesting, but...
Date: 2001-10-24 10:28 am (UTC)I readily admit to being skittish about it. Partially because I am very sure that it would send me spiralling into oblivion. Of course, I don't know that for certain - Eleri still wants to get me stoned under controlled conditions. ;)
The power of pyschedelics is that it adjusts your perception - to create wholes in our realities so we can see the man behind the curtain.
The trap is assuming that we don't need the curtain. We cannot exist without the filters we have - that's why we are built to create them. That realization is important, I think, so we can determine when to use the curtain and when to rip a hole.