(no subject)

[novapsyche]

I have a job.

For those just now joining us, I've been without a job for about a week.

What had happened was, I was at my computer, doing what I usually do. My boss came up to the desk to get his mail, saw my monitor, looked at the CD player. He asked me if I was copying something. I said no, I was just listening to my music. He nodded, said okay, and then went back to his office.

(Now, earlier that day, things had started out badly. I'd had a conversation with my direct supervisor, B---, about several things. For starters, she was there at 8:30, which is my start time, not hers. She doesn't have to be there until 9:00. I was there at 8:31. I was a minute late. I had been having problems in recent weeks with my tardiness, and she brought that up to me, and I was trying to do better about it. But it had seemed to me that after all this time, she'd been something akin to babysitting me. Now, what riled me up about that is that she claimed to be resentful for feeling she had to open everything up if she got there before I did.

(So I said good morning to her, then told her that she didn't have to open things when she got in, that she could leave the responsibilities for me. We talked about that for a while, and when I reminded her that she said she felt resentful--her words that she used the week prior--she said I had fabricated that. I just threw my hands up at that point. We went around in circles for a while about several issues, but I ended with the fact that she had basically implied that I was immature, during our conversation the week prior. I just wanted to let her know that that bothered me. And that was the last thing I said to her that morning, other than the normal office pleasantries.)

After lunch, my boss left but said he'd be back in the office in an hour.

He never made it back to the office. At the end of the day, at 4:55 he called and said, "I want you to put me in touch with M----, but before you do, I want to tell you to not play your CDs in the office anymore. I think it's a distraction."

Now this came as a surprise to me, because several months before, he told me at one point to turn down my music because it was too loud. He never said that I couldn't listen to music at all. I had tried to abide by his rule at that point, so for my CDs to suddenly become a problem seemed odd. This actually came as quite a blow to me, too, because the phone was a major form of stress and music was one of the ways I managed that stress.

"I don't understand why you feel it's a distraction," I said.

"I don't understand why you're questioning the man who signs your paycheck!" he said.

"I'm sorry, I'm not trying to question you," I said. "I'm just trying to understand where this is coming from."

"What is there to understand? I think it's a distraction. Don't play your music anymore. I want you to follow my order."

"Okay, I will. You and B--- and I were supposed to have our meeting today, I guess it's going to be postponed?"

"It's going to have to be postponed!"

"Okay. I'll transfer you to M----."

Usually when my boss talks to someone in the office, he jumps around and talks to everyone. The office closest to the reception area is that of the accountant, D----. She hung up the phone as I was in the middle of an email to my boss, and the words she said was, "She's fired. Finally."

So I wrapped up my email and went to my rehabilitation meeting. I was really afraid I'd lost my job. I finished that meeting, went to see lameautarch and caught him up to speed. I told him I felt 70% sure that I was going to be fired the next day. I talked a lot of things out with him, and he helped me clear my head.

The next morning, I didn't want to go to work, but I knew I had to do it. In the email I'd asked him if he and I could talk privately before the three of us did. I had to show up. I was there on time. I still was not the first person there.

I completed my morning tasks and had just sat down to doing my duties when my boss walked in the door at 9:00 a.m. He never comes in that early. He came in, set his stuff down in his office, came back and said we could have our meeting now. And that's when he proceeded to fire me.

I should have seen it coming, because he started out with praise, about how I was about the nicest person he's ever had to work with. How pleasant I am and how good I am with the phones. How everyone loves to come talk to me.

I did see it coming, but his approach threw me off guard. I thought there might have been a way for me to talk my way back into my job. But within seven sentences I was to hear the phrase, "I'm sorry, you're fired." And there was no budging him from that decision.

When I asked him, and I did several times, as to why, he pointed to our conversation the day before. Yes, he had heard about my altercation with B---, but it was the conversation that really put things into relief for him. I had questioned his authority. He said it spoke volumes to him.

He said I was too immature to work in his employ.

He said he was surprised I wasn't more upset. I told him I had the feeling that he was going to fire me. I told him what I'd heard the day before, and he said that he hadn't discussed it with anyone. He said that he came to his decision that evening, on his own.

But we left on good terms. I told him, "You know, I like you not only as a boss but as a person. I really thought I could contribute to this company. I saw myself here for years. I'm sorry you didn't see it that way." He hugged me before I left. It was the most surreal firing I've ever been through.

So forgive me for not posting about this sooner. I'm still in shock, even though it's been a full week.

Now I will be working in the same office building, just for a different employer.

Some things come full circle.